Today, in an unannounced episode of the Satirical Energy Review, post-election suggestions for new energy and environmental twits.

A collection of fake energy information for political pseudo-influencers

Recent election cycles have shown the need to show simple and catchy information that could be posted and reproduced (e.g. on Twitter) to support a particular political option or concept. Since all information has a short period of freshness, but no one checks this information, there is a demand for a new leave, something like “political energy fakes.” As part of a heat, I once wrote that the EU would ban internal combustion cars on weekends in a few years, which was immediately picked up (even by some politicians). Encouraged now by the holiday and post-election time – I’m tossing out a new set of made-up suggestions to show on my Twitter account for the sake of balance – feats for now for opponents of the energy transition and new changes (a set for their supporters is in the pipeline).

Thus, for those on the “no” side:

Reflections (reflections) from large PV farms cause problems for birds (stroboscopic effect)

Several articles in reputable periodicals (Energies, Journal of Renewable Energy, Journal of Avian Biology) show the hitherto unaddressed problem of the stroboscopic effect of large solar farms. In particular, the work of British scientists at the Wellington College of Advanced Studies (Prof. Beacon et al.) is causing concern by showing that flocks of birds get lost during migration due to light reflections from solar panels. In Poland, research on the impact of PV on stork flights is already being conducted by the Gdansk University of Technology and Social Sciences (team of Prof. Grazyna Zieleniewicz-Boncar).

Giant landfills of used panels and windmills in Niger – it turns out that hundreds of thousands of square kilometres of landfills of old equipment have been discovered in the desert areas of Africa, and that’s why there is now a revolution in the Sahel countries, as pastoralists are losing leftover land for grazing goats and camels.

Mandatory additives to sausages made from so-called “organic meat” in EU directive from 2028 – new Fit, 4 55 food chapter, indicates that it is necessary to add organic components to processed meat in the form of vegan mixtures (grasses or tree bark) or insects or dried ringworms of the skink class (e.g., earthworms).

Gas stations will not be allowed to be located near schools and churches.

The progressive lobbying of electric cars is introducing proposals for provisions on mandatory distances of gas stations from educational institutions, places of worship, and public administration buildings, of course, to accelerate electromobility, as there is no such ban for electric chargers.

Converting airports to rail—banning short trips—is already a development of French ideas about shifting air traffic over distances of less than 2.5 hours (aeroplane flight) to high-speed rail. It is mandatory for all EU countries, and if you don’t have high-speed rail, then you must build it.

Lack of rare metals results in stoppages in European factories – the problem now concerns such elements as yttrium and neoidyme because, as far as lithium is concerned, it is ok; there is a strenuous search for neodymium in Suwałki, but environmentalists are blocking the chances of billions to the budget.

Chinese electric cars with spy devices – in simple terms like Google Maps cars- have hidden cameras and microphones. Our every move and conversation will be recorded (including from inside the car), and the data will be immediately transmitted to Chinese websites for commercial offers.

Mandatory labeling of coal and gas—once it seemed impossible to label livestock, now it’s time for fuels. Starting next year, mandatory biomarker labelling or mandatory isotopic certificates of chemical composition will be introduced to avoid problems with surreptitious imports of raw materials from embargoed or banned countries. Again, this will hit fossil fuel installations.

The European directive states that you should have a mandatory stop after 3 hours of driving—typical lobbying of roadside restaurants and manufacturers. Starting in 2028, every new car in the EU must have an automatic stop-start system after 3 hours of uninterrupted driving. For now, sandwiches and thermoses of coffee are allowed, but manufacturers are also working on that.

Not only winter tires, but also autumn and spring tires—another expansion of markets here, too. Recent sponsored studies indicate a great number of accidents caused by using the wrong tires in the so-called transition period (spring or autumn), which should be eliminated with a new type of tire (transition tires). So, we will be replacing tires four times a year. Shares of Oponeo and other tire-related businesses are going up fast.

Hydrogen diffusion can cause poisoning, so it turns out that hydrogen pipelines are not as safe as thought. Due to its tiny size, hydrogen easily passes through pipe walls or improper connections and can be very dangerous to humans. Even microscopic amounts of pure hydrogen affect the human body, causing hallucinogenic states and, in the long term, psychosis. This calls into question the planned hydrogen policy in the EU until 2030.

In Portugal, new RES installations have been banned due to over-utilization of agricultural land – Portugal’s new Partido da Nova Esperança (PNE – Party of New Hope) government headed by Prime Minister João Oliveira, who took power after winning this year’s elections, is radically changing course on RES and temporarily suspending all new solar power plant and onshore wind farm projects due to the growing scarcity of agricultural land. Reports indicate that the exponential increase in the construction of new RES power plants (Portugal already has 90% renewable energy) is upsetting the balance on agricultural land and causing a decline in vegetable and fruit crops. The most popular vegetable and a staple of local cuisine (Galician cabbage) has to be imported! From Poland, among others.

I suggest fake news, and I no longer know if, in today’s world, they will either live their own lives for a while or, worse… turn out to be true.